We'll be there between February and September

A friend recently forwarded me this article about southwestern bell getting sued by some group in Texas, asserting they have delivered 0 of the umpteen things advertised in their DSL package. You'll have to scrape my dumbfounded ass off of the floor, because I've only been waiting for them to show up at my place since 2.28.00. It's remarkable that someone could possibly find a chink in their suit of capability.

If you are one of the minions considering using them as your high speed internet provider, consider the following unadvertised feature list:
   6 month installation turnaround
   2 counts of lost customer record
   9 non-callbacks
   3 no-shows to my house
    5 failures to complete requested task (i.e. closing account)
And, all this before they even get the product into your home.

Now in their defense, if you're going to screw something up, you might as well do it big, Texas big in this case.

It will be a cold day in hell

One of the better email offerings I've run across. Betcha never thought that getting shut down by a girl would get you an A on the mid-term. Don't give up on it because of the heady sciency school like feel. The good part is at the end...I can't believe he used her name.

Ahhhhh, you're all wet!!!!

Colleague and friend Chris McGrath recently resigned his post as senior web devloper where I work and relocated to Sarajevo, Bosnia to do what he and his wife Gina do best, help others. Chris certainly goes down as one of the most unique and inspiring people I've run into in my not-so-short life. Doubt my word, visit his web site to see how he says so-long to corporate america and I think you'll be a believer.

Still not convinced. See how Chris holidays in British Columbia before jetting to Bosnia.

Did you ask for this?

Below are two files that I've had several people ask for which I've delivered to approximately none of them. Since I cannot remember who asked for what, I'll just post both of them and anyone who wants them can have them. NOTE: Right click on the file to download.

The first is a home-made CD jacket sleeve (25kb) for any who may have heard of Napster and make their own cds. This is a word doc and has information for a bloodhound gang cd which you would, of course, modify and print. I'm not sure if non-laster printers can handle the lyrics side of the document. If not, just delete them.

This second file is a shopping list (131kb) that Marty and I use to track our food needs for our next trip to the market. Again, you would modify this as needed according to your own dietary habits. and if your half as anal as myself, you would set it up to correspond to your route through the store. This is also a word doc, and any printer should be able to handle it.

Whatcha listening to?

find yourself tapping your toe to the latest eminem offering and pissed off that you are tapping your toe to the latest eminem offering. don't sweat it. a lot of people are suffering from the same affliction, finding themselves unable to resist this verbal pied piper.

historically, rap has utilized the pedestrian format of rhyming the last word of every two lines. accepting this postulate, we have all dabbled in modern rap via our adolescent poetry written for a Mrs. Frink or whoever your junior high english teacher may have been. granted, some more abitious rappers embraced an elizabethan or victorian approach, integrating modest forms of iambic pentameter and other like designs into their prose.

but, emimem introduces us to a technique he has created, mastered and popularized. this dopplar modification to the static norm presents a technique he terms the 'inline rhyme'. DEFINED: rhyme as many words as possible on every line. RESULT: a whole lot of people pissed off that they are tapping their toe to the music.

Profile: Mike

In that this web site has been crafted greatly for my friends and family, I thought it prudent to introduce some of you to people who are not you (unless you are being profiled) but share a friend in common.

Batting first is Michael Engelbrecht. While many of you may have not personally met Michael...you all know him. Think back to a tale told around campfires and dinner tables of the adult male who was felled at the foot of the St. Louis Arch by a rather persistent maternal bird and I'll think you'll recall meeting, at least, the legend of Michael Engelbrecht.