i have a friend who is a work addict. how addicted? he lives in colorado. i live in the mid-west. he lives a few hours from some of the best skiing in the world. i live a twelve hours from that same skiing. yet, i ski more every year than he does. that's how addicted he is to work. (and yes, he does like skiiing).
now i am not faulting him for being addicted to something. we all have our proclivities. i only faulted him for
what he was addicted to—a corporate job. and every time we would get together, this would inevitably become part of the conversation, as uncomfortable and futile as we all knew it was.
but after better than twenty years, my friend recently broke his bonds of addiction and left the company that transfixed him all of these years. he was a different man overnight. and not only did he go skiing with bookguy and i last winter, he also took us to a college football game last fall.
while on my spring break vacation this year, he left me a voice mail. he said he need to talk with me. his voice was serious and he didn't give any additional details. i feared that something happened to one of his parents. i excused myself from our company, went outside and returned his call. the family was fine but his addiction was being tested. a new company had approached him with a very appealing executive job offer. the downside would be he would surely fall into his old ways of seventy hour work weeks and no off days. he confessed to seeing the peril at hand but explained that it was a very good job offer, one that lots of people would want and even more people would question his turning down.
we talked it through and found a position that showed how passing on it would in the end prove to be better career capital than taking it AND that it would allow him to continue enjoying his current life that offered more balance and leisure. we ended the call but just as you might worry about a more conventional addiction problem, i worried for my friend.
he was to deliver his decision the next day. i wrote him the following night and asked him how it went.
DISCLAIMER:
admittedly, this following exchange will only mean something for people who are RABID fans of the cohen brothers' film Raising Arizona. if you are not a huge fan of that movie, this may not mean much to you but if you revered it like me and many of mine did, you will find the close of this email exchange to be a great homage to the film and mighty clever response to the situation.
On Mar 20, 2017, at 8:47 PM, Troy DeArmitt wrote:
hey snake,
just checking in to see how things went today.
hopefully you navigated the chop without issue.
t
On Mar 20, 2017, at 10:26 PM, snake wrote:
I was actually just thinking of emailing you. I told the company that I was going to decline their offer. They did say they would hold it open another day if I change my mind, so I have had some anxiety tonight. Thanks for the time yesterday.
On Mar 20, 2017, at 10:15 PM, Troy DeArmitt wrote:
stay the course.
put it behind you. it was the right decision today. it will be the right decision tomorrow.
and it will be the right decision if they call you tomorrow and offer you 30% more and a signing bonus.
but i get that it is hard.
good luck with it.
t
On Mar 21, 2017, at 12:03 AM, snake wrote:
Thanks man. At ----- my job became my life. I am still working on changing that mindset. But as H.I. McDunough said to the Maricopa County parole board about his recidivist past "that ain't me no more."
and marty mocked me and my friends who could and would perform whole swaths of that movie back and forth during long drives in the car ("nobody sleeps naked in this house!") or even over dinner ("what now little brother?"). she said that memorizing the lines from that movie would never come in handy. with such a bad eye for future value, it is lucky for marty that "she's a flower ... just a little desert flower."
