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MONORAIL: ENTRY ARCHIVE [current]   [random]
PERSONAL (permalink) 11.28.2001
i blame it on the dolphin
sunday morning, marty and i awoke and groggily exchanged our dreams from that night's slumber.

while doing some last-minute cramming for my class final right before the test, i looked up and realized that we all had lockers next to our seats in the room. sidetracked, i opened mine to find a disaster. i immediately set out to cleaning up a semester?s worth of garbage, totally ignoring the professor?s announcement that we were changing rooms to take our exam. later looking up and seeing everyone was gone, i panicked since i didn?t know where they went. i raced to the department office for help only to find bookguy running things, unsurprisingly. marilyn monroe was sleeping in a chair in the corner of the office. i found this equally unsurprising. so i went over and started talking to her and five minutes later, we?re making out and yes you guessed it, also not surprising. as is often the case in my dreams, i suddenly and desperately needed to go to the bathroom. so i fled marilyn and dashed to the toilet only to find it stopped up, no doubt the skilled work of one bookguy. given my urgency i was not dissuaded and began to relieve myself. as many have probably experienced this phenomenon, albeit not nearly as frequently as myself, you know the drill and how it typically pans out. fortunately for the guest bed in my mother?s home i awoke in the nick of time and drowsily stumbled to the real toilet down the hall and was consequently spared an awkward lecture from my mother in front of my wife come morning.

meanwhile, on marty?s pillow, she was studying for a statistics test, a class which she is not taking. someone told her she could say her baby was sick and get excused from the deadline. she did this. now that she had gobs of time, she was kicking around and passed the school gymnasium. she saw that they were holding basketball tryouts and thought she?d give it a whirl. in her initial discussions with the coach she learned that they only had varsity shorts left and those were therefore the only positions they were looking to fill. she knew her skills would only earn her a spot on the jv team and since she was a senior could not entertain such a thought knowing full-well that e-love would make fun of her in this role. so she instead opted to go out and train her pet dolphin.

i swear, marty?s dreams go from being overly pedestrian to wildly fantastic in such a blip. i mean, i was at least making out with marilyn monroe before almost making wee in the bed.




 
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