If I had written this a month ago, I would have used the figure 40. If I had written this last week, I would have needed 80. Today I must tell you that 120 gay men in the United States--most of them here in New York--are suffering from an often lethal form of cancer called Kaposi's sarcoma, or from a virulent form of pneumonia that may be associated with it. More than 30 have died.

The men who have been stricken don't appear to have done anything that many New York gay men haven't done at one time or another. We're appalled that this is happening to them and terrified that it could happen to us. It's easy to become frightened that one of the many things we've done or taken over the past years may be all that it takes for a cancer to grow from a tiny something-or-other that got in there who knows when from doing who knows what. This is our disease and we must take care of each other and ourselves.