i could tell you but you wouldn't believe me. i could draft a check out right in front of you and you'd swear it would bounce. i could count the hundred dollar bills out and place them in your wallet and you'd simply remove one, sniff it and snap it with your index finger, certain i printed them in my basement. what i'm saying is i could tell you the amount of money i'm willing to pay the individual who tivo'd or taped the recently aired Behind the Camera: The Unauthorized Story of 'Three's Company' but you simply wouldn't believe me.

marty and i sat down while it was in its last hour and each secretly chortled at the other for watching it but by the end we were feverish to know what happened in the initial two hours. this would be the two hours that set the stage for the tumultuous and riveting finale.

we must see this.

me and my checkbook will be waiting for your call.