the holiday season is upon us which means an uptick in our social get togethers. as has been discussed previously, i am always on the lookout for great questions to be asked of people i meet. the safest and most productive question i've ever run across is simply "What are your interest?" versus the american staple "what do you do?" which is one of the worst possible questions for a whole variety of reasons. the "interests" question should get any conversation moving and if it does not, like they say they have no interest, then you know to cut bait (fast) and mingle your way to the next party-goer.

should that fail or you already used that question on someone at last year's party, i've got a new one for you to churn the conversational waters. the question is: what is your most memorable moment from last year?

i've been using this for a bit and it is raw, uncut gold. but brace yourself because this simple query can lead anywhere. expect everything from the mundane (i finally got a promotion i've been wanting) to the fascinating (i dissected a human cadaver) to the tragic (i lost my mother). aside from the mundane, which can usually offer something with some work (do you think there is antying you could have done to get the promotion sooner?), you are assured of avoiding re-hashing people's netflix queues, pop music taste and favorite eateries.

while the cadaver conversation was extraordinary, my favorite detail from this young medical student was about the initial moments of the experience. upon first seeing the body she described the confusing blend of panic and fascination but the dominant memory was hearing a student behind her sobbing as the dissection began. the downside of this new super-question is holiday parties are not long enough to fit everyone in. i could have talked to cadaver-girl for three hours and not have even been close to done and there were twenty more people to get to.

this is a super small example of why the day countdown (Oct Gallery) matters as much as it does to me. because once bella leaves home, the family dynamic we have known since our family with children began is forever changed. and it is not about the giant factors like having an empty bed or one less dinner plate but these small daily moments that i will likely miss the most. these innocent interactions which most people seem to pay no mind are sort of thing i have most coveted and enjoyed watching. perhaps it is because i am an only child and never got to be part of such inter-play. unsure. but it is something i will miss dearly.

the above screen shot shows a web page i look at nearly every day. it is part of a collection of webpages i use to motivate and remind me of things important to me. i originally made the above page to look at before leaving the office to help me shift from work mode to family mode. when i first made it, the day count in red had thousands of days. now it has hundreds of days, and barely so.
View in Gallery >>>

you know how when people take a picture they sometimes yell an instruction like "everyone smile" or "everyone be goofy"? I think for this picture the instruction yelled was "everyone be their genuine selves". i say this because i've never seen a picture that so perfectly captures the essence of these four people.

going around the circle.
Marty just bleeds natural and confident hap ...

here is an email exchange between best bud and business partner matthew and i in regard to an email he had sent to a client.

---

if that email was a tennis shot, my coach would say "good ball".

well played matthew.

t

---

And if a ball hits the back fence on a fly - what does your tennis coach say to that? Or maybe you have never experienced that?

mcf

---

when that happens he says, "oh, i see matthew is joining us today".

;-)

t

---

Good ball!

mcf

---

there is a handful of humans who think i have it too easy. they believe that the world just opens up before me and provides me undue rewards and riches. these boons come in all sorts of sizes and looks. my assumption has always been that everyone gets these sorts of things. they can be as big as scoring the mother i did and as small as getting the good table by the window. those that don't know me...