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MONORAIL: Entries Tagged with DANCE (8)

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ENTERTAINMENT 2009-01-23
dancing has always been one of the most peculiar human behaviors to me.
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ENTERTAINMENT, FAMILY, TECHNOLOGY 2008-04-14
week in review, day 1 (anthony)
the last week in our house has been unique. i have been laid up in bed for six days now, only getting up to visit the bathroom, and this only when the need becomes dire. my mother stayed with us the first few days, primarily to take care of me. and marty has been doing the whole single parent thing with the kids. in that i'm stuck in bed, the house plays out more like theater to me than life. my family serves as the characters swishing in and out of my doorjamb view throughout the day. this week, i'm going to take a day for each personality and write about what makes their performance noteworthy, to my eyes at least.


let me start with anthony. he's the only one in the house i'm actually afraid of. the older kids understand i can't play or roughhouse. anthony does not. and he is a hooligan. and he is completely unpredictable. and he is the absolute wrong height to be walking around people who just had knee surgery. and he moves about the house with a cocky swagger that smacks more of a ivy league frat boy than a diapered and wordless child. when i see him stop at my door my body tenses. most times though, he just walks directly to my side and rifles through the glasses and dishes sitting on my bedside table. he reaches into full glasses to pull out a little handful of ice which he sloppily moves to his mouth. it is not uncommon for this trespass to topple glasses and crash dishes to the floor. his raids are inelegant and unquiet.

when he's not stealing or upending my food stuffs he dances for me. the style most resembles a little soft-shoe with his feet shuffling about, his arms swinging at his side. while dancing, he watches his feet in a studious manner as if evaluating his technique, although i believe he is just taking in the show as is anyone else watching. after a bit he seems to sense the need to mix it up so he turns around and steals away in our bedroom's double door closet which is situated just behind his dancing stage. once inside he pulls the doors closed, mostly. through the small gap he peeks out. when he sees you seeing him he giggles and waits. after an unpredictable pause in time he flamboyantly throws the doors open, jogging forward to the ohhs and ahhs of the crowd. he will then turn and again disappear into the closet for a repeat performance. and no one will ever question his stamina or dedication to the show given how many encores he's prepared to deliver. he is a consummate showman.
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ENTERTAINMENT, FAMILY 2007-11-02
the wedding
i've recently talked a few times about the day we went to a wedding a few weeks back. i was just sent a link to a bunch of the images from the event and found some share-worthy. first, here is a picture of bella doing her thing after the ceremony.

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here's walt and i at the reception before the music started.

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and here's walt thirty seconds after the first song of the night.

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and here she is sixty seconds after the first song of the night, and up two dance partners.

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and here's a lucky picture of the first drunk guy i've ever enjoyed in my life.

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he was spectacular.

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and the later it got, the more entertaining he became.

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at one point in the evening i commented to marty that had she married the dancing, drunk guy instead of me, she might actually have problems adjusting to someone who could outdance her at a wedding reception. this guy never once left the dance floor (wether it was empty or not). marty shot me a look that told me this was the most daft thing i've ever said to her. i stand corrected. and if i were the hot pants dancing guy, i'd stand on my head corrected.
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ENTERTAINMENT 2006-10-06
the rave party in this only child's head
this video portrays how i think my life would have been different if i had a sibling ...

and could dance ...

and looked good in a red thong ...
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LIFE, ENTERTAINMENT, FAMILY, WEB 2006-01-10
but i don't even own a cellphone

click to watch

more than one person has commented to me that they imagine this is how i am at work. it is clear to me that those people either ...
  1. work with me currently
  2. worked with me in the past
  3. have or had a hidden camera set up in my office.
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ENTERTAINMENT, FAMILY 2004-06-30
see it wiggle, watch it jiggle
you know how those dancers, some dancers, can make their butt shake and bounce crazy fast. you know, the ones in the music videos where they turn around and hold their arms in the air, which somehow signals the cameraman to zoom onto their ass because it's about to do some magical stuff. and then it shakes like Jell-O on the train. you wouldn't know it to look at me, but i can do this, just like the girls in the video.

well, let me amend that. i can do this while face-down in bed and about to go to sleep. since i don't dance or often raise my arms over my head this is the obvious place for me to discover this talent. i'm not sure if i can do it while standing, i haven't tried it, am actually a little scared to try it, but while sprawled across the bed i look like j-lo herself.
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ENTERTAINMENT, FAMILY, LIFE 2003-11-27
Photo Gallery: November 2003


i recently admitted i don't like to dance. it even more recently struck me what a vast understatement that was. to say i don't like to dance is like saying i don't like to run the underside of my penis through a cheese-grater often.

i'm not a dancer. marty is a dancer. marty is a groin-grinding, hip-bucking, trunk-slapping dancer. it's a fame thing. it's a solid gold thing. it's a rhyth...
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ENTERTAINMENT, FAMILY, FRIENDS, LIFE 2002-08-02
embarrassed by that? it's not even in my top 10.
if you wandered into the what i'm hearing section, you may have noticed it has a new look. in spending the last few days hacking on that, i devoted many cycles on listening to music, thinking about music, organizing my music and even laying hands on some new music. in fact, this month's offering comes from bookguy. now this unemployed bloke jet sets all over the planet and the one dirge he returns with has a total of nine unique words in it, and they're not even in english. sheesh. and, of what little spanish i know, these scant words don't even seem right. i asked bookguy about this and he replied:
me gustas tu - indirect object pronouns precede the verb. in this case the literal translation is 'you are pleasing to me', idiomatically it means i like you.
what can i say, bookguy's smart. bookguy also doesn't question native speakers on matters of their own tongue. like i said, smart. once satisfied with its grammatical correctness i listened to this nine-word, four-minute song on repeat for one hour. i'm smart too.

well, anyway, back to these random thoughts on music. one thing i recalled dealt with how my mother never knocked before coming into my room. any women reading this, please just accept that you should not walk straight into teenage boys rooms without some sort of fanfare or ceremony announcing the visit. you'll will hear things going on behind the door before it opens. this is good. you want this to be happening. ultimately i'm just trying to save you the embarrassment my mother suffered when she burst into my room and found me standing in front of a full length mirror singing and dancing to the Grease soundtrack. i was all over every move from the Greased Lightning bit, using my bed as the car. regrettably, i had the music up so loud i didn't hear her enter and continued the mini-production until her laughter overwhelmed my Optimus speaker 'system'. and, yes i had the whole arm pointing and hip bucking thing all worked out too. i don't play when i'm getting my greased lightning going.

amazingly given this trauma, somehow, years later, i was able to overcome the shame of my mother's invasion enough to ask a girl to move around funny with me on the dance floor at a junior high, all-stag affair. jenna something conceded (astoundingly) and we weaved our way through the crowd to the beginnings of hipsway's honeythief. we settled on a spot and marked it as ours by stopping, facing one another and then moving about in a seizing manner. my mother wasn't around so my body was quick to do what it does. falling into the zone, i drifted somewhere else, my head rolling back looking upwards at the tile ceiling and the random streamers coming down as my body fought an invisible enemy. i was really starting to let go, opening it up some might say, but who couldn't, this is hipsway we're talking about. but again, regrettably, my introduction to dance with other humans was cut short when my thrusting hand accidentally struck my partner in the ribcage leaving her slightly bent, holding her side and breathing irregularly. as people stopped to look and a smallish circle formed i could tell that some people may have been embarrassed by this development but those people would not have spent a moment of their life standing in their underwear, soaked with sweat, a musical playing behind them and shouting at their mother to stop laughing, get out of their room and to try knocking next time.
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