EMPLOYEE (answering phone)
Main Library, Information Services, how may I help you?
CUSTOMER
I need to find out how to file a complaint about a Federal Employee.
EMPLOYEE
Well ma'am, it might make a difference where the person works. Do you know which agency they are affiliated with?
CUSTOMER
Yes, the EEOC. (Equal Employment Opportunity Commission for any yokels out there)
EMPLOYEE
Please wait a moment while I try to find that information.
(puts woman on hold. Returns minutes later)
Ma'am, there does not seem to be a specific procedure for filing a complaint. However, I have the names and phone numbers of both the local director and the director in Washington D.C.
(conveys information)
CUSTOMER
Thank you, I'm still puzzled though. They put up a display of bedroom furniture in my workplace and a black woman took my complaint. Since she works for the EEOC I know she endorses the NAACP and they are raising a stink about the confederate flag in South Carolina, which is where I'm from. If black people can get upset about the confederate flag why can't they understand why a white woman would be offended by bedroom furniture in the workplace.
Anyway, I just wanted to give you a logical explanation so you wouldn't think I was wasting your time.
EMPLOYEE
Ma'am, no one who calls here and asks a question is wasting my time. Thank you for calling and please let us know if you need anything else.
You may at this very moment be wondering what this woman is saying. This is a good thing. You should be wondering what she is saying. If you are not, please leave my site now.
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