TROYSCRIPTS

About
the troyscripts explained

Archives
marty-thermic
personal question
don't do that
hello doctor
super spanx
father knows best
brick-dumb
make marty happy
quick tongue
the universal language
siblings
honesty, honestly
priceless
one percent
i prefer the term mature
ice-balls
outfoxed
comfort-what?
have you seen my manhood
front yard
advice
you're welcome
smarts
worm-age
watch out
too sharp
perspective
dream fail
what are you, a comedian
you're what?
awesome ii
awesome
hands where i can see 'em
a phase
left field
logic
sobbing
humiliated
jack, you're in
slackers need not apply
how does this work
rat-fink
mixed-up
rockwell christmas
me-minus
house rules
motivation
confidence
player
vcr
cool and sophisticated
new game
boyfriend
a hole
questions
battle
got religion
realization
i can read
so ya know
don't walk
misdirected
potty words
unexpected
critique
thursday morning
bathroom words
acting out
got milk?
problem solving
timing
totally awesome
dry meat
the c-word
beatdown
mouthache
punked
good to know
adults only
take your meds
onslaught
enjoy your anger
crystal clear
pint size pi
good thinking
i get your wieners
incompetence
oh yeah
shame on you
street credit
get your ass out here
uhhhhmmm
daredevil's club
found
schooled
stand-off
once upon a time
philosophies
sleeping naked
short-lived
keep it down up there
little things
eighteen years
multi-purpose
old (part ii)
curious
no secrets
adolescence
old
sugar-coated
new mom
outmatched
different
mercial
confused
calling home
oma
flavored and scented
try again
just a child
a pack of lies
now?
i'm not sleeping there
smart, smart girl
don't feed the animals
free pizza
the bedtime story
currency
you should know
dinner-table biology
dad has to go
three shows
remedial self-help
the last word
look before you leak
a gooder name
can i keep this?
missing keri
three percenter
things that are yellow
adopt you
37 years in 5 minutes
finish pooping please
marcher
warrior, part ii
go hide
be a warrior
you rang
your name's what?
motherhood
how'd that get in there?
i don't do that
i gotta know
i don't like that
confused (part i)
show me
the uphill battle
life post-larry
hey, i know you
smell my finger
who are you, supergirl?
the lie
i gotta go!
easy money
thanks for telling me
i need a minute
he's only five!
you in the closet?
reach into daddy's pocket
look into my eyes
is that my toothbrush?
overall funk
talk to my people
it's also neat
is there any other kind
did you read that article
the exchange student
hey boo-boo
he does have his limits
i said no!
may i have your attention?
i have a question
but it's dirty
that explains it
museum naked
feelin' sexy
little bo sheep
infinitesimal talk
hale bop alula
ipod you
thanking delusion
chiniqua
circuitious
what did you say?
the reflex
oh that kind of house
would you mind?
naked
excuse me ladies
is that egg on your face?
boy genius
questions aren't dumb
the wedding toast (part i)
andy gibb is coming
ring the bell sir
the party line
i need penis problems
grab a kneeler
drive faster mom!
white castle
heat sucks
the wrong question
special hole
you order wrong
who's circumcised

NOW?
< prev next >
CAST: alex and troy
SETTING:   the basement
SCENE: alex has asked to paint a wooden boat he floats in tubs and ponds. we have just gone down to the basement to find my workbench a mess from my last project.

TROY
alex, it will just be a minute. i gotta clean the workbench off.

ALEX
can i start painting now dad?

TROY
no bud. i gotta clean this up first.

ALEX
why?

TROY
so you have room to work.

ALEX
is it ready now?

TROY
no alex. i just started. it's going to take me a few minutes.

ALEX
can i start now?

TROY
not yet.

ALEX
now?

TROY
no bud. it's going to be several minutes. i need you to be patient.

ALEX
how long will it be?

TROY
five minutes.

ALEX
that be too long.

TROY
that not be too long. look it's already getting better.

ALEX
then i paint now?

TROY
no. i still gotta get this side.

ALEX
why you still got that side?

TROY
because there's still stuff on it.

ALEX
and you clean it?

TROY
yes. i'm trying to clean it off so you can paint.

ALEX
i can paint now?

TROY
no alex you cannot paint now. and you gotta stop asking. i'm working as fast as i can here.

(he quietly watches me as i frenetically clear the remaining space. i hurriedly throw some paper down, get him a brush and open a can of paint. he methodically begins his task. i busy myself in another part of the basement. about ten minutes later, i hear...)

ALEX
i done dad.

TROY (walking over)
let's have a look. wow bud. it looks great. you did awesome.

ALEX
i have to paint the bottom.

TROY
well, we're going to have to wait for the top to dry so we can flip it over.

ALEX
is it dry now?

TROY
well no it's not dry now. you just finished painting it.

ALEX
how long will it be?

TROY
it's going to take awhile. like maybe two arthurs.

ALEX
ahhhh. that be too long.

TROY
well. that be what it be. sorry bud.

(i walk back to where i was working and after about 30 seconds i hear)

ALEX
is it ready now dad?




on the positive side, five years ago i would have only made it through about 12 seconds of this 240 second exchange.




NOW?
< prev next >


Welcome Professional MonoRail TroyScripts Gallery